what if youre not sure you want to start dating your friend
"Your mind volition reply most questions if yous learn to relax and wait for the reply." ~William S. Burroughs
When I was in college, I could only afford to visit my family during summertime and Christmas breaks. While I was at dwelling, I peculiarly enjoyed spending fourth dimension with one dear friend. Nosotros had known each other since junior high school, and I considered her the younger sister I never had.
During my sophomore yr in school, she contacted me and revealed she had romantic feelings for me. She wanted u.s. to start dating.
I was completely caught off guard. I had no thought she felt this style. Sensing my disharmonize, she asked that I think about information technology and said we would talk when I saw her that summer.
For the remainder of that semester, I agonized over what I should practice. One night, when I was lone in my dorm room, I took a deep breath and asked myself some very of import questions that I needed to answer simply had been avoiding. Did I share the same feelings she had for me? Did I desire us to begin dating?
Past being still and questioning myself, I gained access to my inner voice, which I had been drowning out in my panic.
It revealed that while I did love her, I wasn't in love with her. Pursuing a relationship primarily out of fright of losing her would have been unfair to both of us, and it would take caused us to not live in truth.
That summer was difficult. When I told her how I truly felt, she was understandably hurt. Nonetheless, our friendship survived because we both realized we cared enough to be brutally honest with each other, and that is rare.
To this solar day, I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I didn't mind grandmother's wisdom, and had reacted out of fear instead of stopping to question my true feelings.
If you are having doubts almost a relationship, delight let me assure you the answers you seek are within you lot. You just may be allowing fear to muffle your inner vocalism.
The following are 30 questions that can help you lot attain more clarity about your relationship—what's working, what's not, and why. Please keep in mind at that place are no wrong or right answers, just insightful ones:
1. Practice you completely trust each other?
2. Do you lot believe in soul mates, and if so, do y'all believe you are each other'due south?
3. When was the concluding time you said, "I love you?" If information technology'south been a while, why?
4. Are you satisfied with the intimacy yous share?
five. How often do you laugh together?
6. Exercise you feel you take fabricated personal sacrifices for your relationship, and have they been reciprocated?
7. When you lot think of your partner, practice y'all smile?
8. Do you lot feel threatened when others find your partner attractive, and why?
9. Do you believe your partner is your biggest abet?
10. How do you lot feel most your partner's views on finances?
11. Do you savour spending time with your partner's relatives? Friends?
12. Do either of you lot dredge up resentments in arguments, and why have y'all struggled to let them go?
13. How exercise you feel when your partner arrives dwelling after being abroad?
fourteen. Is your partner your all-time friend?
xv. Is at that place a secret you lot are keeping that if your partner knew, you feel you would lose them?
sixteen. Do you feel that your partner accepts you?
17. When did y'all realize you had fallen in love, and how practise you feel when y'all think about information technology?
18. Have you seen each other at your best and worst?
19. Would you always consider having an thing? Why? Why not?
twenty. Are you excited about your future together?
21. Do you lot feel your human relationship is a true partnership?
22. When was your terminal romantic outing?
23. Does information technology bother you if your partner has friends of the contrary sex, and why?
24. Do y'all accept each other'southward conventionalities systems?
25. When was the final fourth dimension y'all talked about your future together, and were you lot on the aforementioned page?
26. Do you lot feel as if y'all can communicate without saying a give-and-take?
27. What is your happiest memory of your time together? Your worst? Are at that place more happy memories than unhappy ones?
28. What is a human relationship deal breaker for you lot, and have you lot overlooked one in this relationship?
29. How do you lot feel near the final, in-depth conversation y'all and your partner had?
xxx. Do you show your love for each other often, and if not, why?
If you are seeking clarity about your human relationship, the best source of insight is from within. You but need to be unafraid to inquire for the answers you seek. Then trust those answers and yourself.
Wishing you lot much love and success!
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Source: https://tinybuddha.com/blog/30-questions-to-help-if-you-have-doubts-about-your-relationship/